Finally becoming just another human

I wish I had more energy I say to myself then think again. After a lifetime of being busy all the time, a workaholic who prided myself on being able to function on four hours sleep a night, an advocate so passionate that once I signed onto a project, I ate drank and slept it- I got up in the middle of the night to write press releases, gulped coffee while reading dozens of news sites in first hours of the day- I work-work-worked starting around age fifteen and don’t regret a minute of it: But now I'm tired At age 75 I want to linger over first cup of coffee and get around to making the second cup an hour later, sit sometimes like in a trance binge watching series on Prime or YouTube, laughing at senseless jokes; indeed I'm often mindless nowadays after decades of being so sharp I developed razor's edges all over my personality- I'm finally slowing down and softening, simplifying. Finally. It feels great,

On top of a manic approach to work, I was a single parent from age 40 on and I couldn't just bake cookies now and then. I had to be a Stepford Single Mom, rushing through days determined that everything be perfect- except for my relationship with my children, but that's another blog post… At one point I was riding L.A. transit to Burbank every evening and working overnight at a transcription company then riding back to our apartment in Thai Town where I worked a second job from home. During this time I invented “power sleep” a way to get all the rest you need for the day in about twenty minutes. You find the minutes before sunrise that are the absolute darkest minutes of the night, then lie down flat and repose, intensely. Then twenty minutes later as the day breaks, get up and start another jam packed workaholic day. I used to do that. Around 2005 to 2008 or so I did that several nights a week. Then I added producing City of Angels Blog about the pedophile priests to my schedule, and wrote all those stories, a full time job in itself, for ten years. No wonder I'm tired. Rightfully tired.

Honest, starting at age 15: June 2022 post: I was a teenage anti Vietnam war activist. Memoir by Kay Ebeling, featuring Nancy Pelosi and the Black Panthers https://cityofangels25.blogspot.com/2022/06/encountering-black-panthers-and-nancy.html

-ke