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Wednesday, April 17, 2019

Notre Dame fire shows me how out in left field I am, oh well

I think we all need to step back and take a deep breath, and then create Notre Dame Park with thousands of affordable apartments to replace the cathedral. What does humanity need more?
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Something about the millions being raised to rebuild a cathedral 24 hours after it burned when the global economy is faltering and failing is.. an abomination. And a Knee-Jerk way too fast reaction without stopping to think, but that's humans in the CO2 atmosphere they are breathing, getting dumber and dumber and dumber.
I'm sorry it burned down but rebuilding it with today's materials will probably be an abomination in itself. I say tear it the rest of the way down, leave the Rose Window for an attraction. 
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If I were broke and living in a crappy apartment in Paris, I'd say, let us move into a cathedral if you build it. 
but... I'm not even a real human so what do I know.
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thank god I'm not going to be an earthling much longer, you guys are nuts
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Isn't there a story in the Bible where people are building a tower to heaven and they never get it built...? Somehow rebuilding Notre Dame reminds me of that... 
Bet they'd a been able to raise a billion dollars in a week to build that tower too if they'd had the internet. just saying.
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I'm getting images in my head of what a 21st century version of Notre Dame cathedral will look like, reconstructed. 
Glass and steel with ads all over it.
Particle board and glue where Oak Trees once held up the roof? 
Maybe Trump will provide the contractors.

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Just shows how much wealth is really out there, and where people's priorities are. They'll watch their fellow humans die in the streets without opening their wallets, but burn down a cathedral and they all become philanthropists for god. 
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I'm going to have to move soon, I know it from conversations in the lobby today about the Notre Dame fire. As I listened I realized how many of my neighbors were Catholic or adjacent, and it actually made me scared, frightened of what is going to happen when one of them figures out I wrote City of Angels Blog. Everywhere I live, someone looks up my last name and googles it and finds the hundreds of blog posts I wrote about pedophile priests. 
Not that I'm ashamed of that work, but I know from experience that people react weird when they find out I'm one of the victims, I know from experience that when Catholics read the blog posts they often become angry. In Lancaster that old man chased me around in his wheelchair, he was in charge of young men’s education in the Catholic church across the street, that whole scene was weird. In Chicago these women set out to be as mean to me as they could once Mikey told everyone what I told him in private about Father Horne-y. That was my first lesson learned about how people react in about 2012. 
In Lancaster another guy hollered “That never happened” at me when I said I was one of the pedophile priest victims. Honest. He had told me he used to be Catholic, so I thought he would understand. I thought he was hot and sexy until he shouted at me when I told him I write about pedophile priests as one of the victims, “That never happened” in a singsong sneering tone of voice. 
That was 2013 or so, people may be more educated now, but I doubt much, especially those who continue to be Catholic in spite of all this evidence (like Republicans who just won’t let go of Donny Trump in spite of everything he's done). 
And so for almost a year now I've lived in a senior complex, an almost intimate setting where conversations happen and my history almost comes up, is undoubtedly going to come up. Today as everyone spoke of Notre Dame, I realized how reverent so many of them are. All of them talked about the cross how what to me was a photographer catching a light ray hitting a cross that survived the fire was somehow a miraculous sign. A few of my friends here on Facebook posted that too. 
All of them, as a group whewing and whooshing to each other because “the cross survived, that's a sure sign of something,” and I'm the science writer in the corner hiding behind my horn-rims saying, yes it's light caught reflecting off metal that did not burn, whoopee, and a photographer caught the image and will probably get a Pulitzer and face time with the Pope as a result. It's a well produced photograph. 
That whoo whoo mystical stuff does not work with me, it's too easily turned into evil, I stay as far away from it as I can and as a result feel very protected. 
Anyway, I'm glad I have not opened up to anyone here yet and it's especially sad because one woman who seems to be so much fun and educated and interesting is also like a zombie Catholic, it's showing this week as she rises at sunrise every AM to take part in some half-Mexican near shamanic thing that goes on in our local church during Holy Week. 
I'm jealous of course because I wish I could participate but my life experiences ruined any church going for me, I know better than to even try. 
It would be nice to be able to open up to someone here about who I am, but so far, everywhere I go, I search the eyes of those I see and find no one to whom I can tell my stories. What I really wish is that I’d meet another writer and together we could put it all down on paper as writing these stories alone is too lonely for me, so I'm not doing it. 
Instead I am sitting off to the side, listening, hoping to hear a buzz word / dog whistle that shows me a person is safe. So far no, but I got time.
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I'm thinking fire was convenient as cathedral needed to be renovated. They waited until 6:45 PM when everyone got out and then boom a fire, now instead of having to find money the Vatican can have a global building fundraiser with Everyone In The World giving them money with tears in their eyes.
It stinks.
Sorry, but I used to write about the Pedophile Priests and Bishops who enabled them. No Way I Trust ANYTHING that is said or done by this church Ever in my Life EVER AGAIN and it sickens me watching everyone believe them without question.
Again.
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has anyone mentioned the thousand years of oppression represented by Notre Dame cathedral?
My vote is for a huge housing project to replace it.
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